Saturday, January 23, 2010

12 year old scholar

"hello" she said.

"you know what happened?" i said to her in excitement.

"what actually made u so exited?" she asked.

I said"I gave 100 bucks to a poor child and he jumped out of joy".

"Is he a beggar?" she asked.

"Ofcourse yes, so what?" I said.

"Don't you even know not to encourage begging? instead you are happy doing so?" she questioned me in a bit serious tone.

"Too many principles, too many ethics. what a friend I got!?" i thought.

"Easy yaar. I just wanted to help him and i did it"I said.

"Ofcourse help him. I would love to hear that you have helped someone, but anyway this isn't the help" she said.

I seriously asked "then what does helping mean to you?".

"Go to them.
Spend your time,know their problem,and help them to solve it if you can" she said.

"Be practical, every time I wanna help, I really cannot spend with them.
It is not so easy.
Moreover though I don't give them money, he/she still remains a beggar.
So in situations where I cannot allot my time for them, if I don't even give money I literally end up not helping them in any of the ways"
I said, making our discussion more serious.

"Where there is a will, there is a way" she said.

I laughed and said "This doesn't convince me. O.K tell me how many times have you helped the needy the way you said to me?"

" definitely never yet,cause advising is different from doing. Now she will really come to know who is making more sense" I thought awaiting her reply.

She took time to answer.

She actually took time to count no. of time she helped.

"May be 10 times" she said.

"what!? you did it?" I asked in a shock as i didn't expect this reply.

"Ya. recently, last week I helped a old lady by carrying her baggage and accompanying her till her destination."she said.

I still remained in shock listening to it.

"Gud.Even i'll try to help in that way then"I said and hanged up the phone.

This conversation made me think the whole day and later realized that in name of practicality I was just searching a reason to justify my act of giving money instead of talking to them.










Next time I came across a beggar, he would roughly be 12years old.

I went near him and said"I'll not give you money but help you, tell me your problem."

Raising his head he said"I dream of having a big car,please make my dream come true."

"whaaaaaaaaat?"I said.

"You said you will help me, so I asked"he said very innocently.

"For that you need to earn.By begging you can never make your dream come true. You need to work something very big."I said.

"Gimme the work or bear my fee so I'll study and earn more later."he said.

"Sorry. I can't but stop begging and seriously try for ur dream."I said.

He laughed at me and said "This is why I beg.Like you, no one helps us. Being born rich, you really don't know why we beg and how tough life is."

"No. don't say so.I'm sure that if you try god will be with you." I said.

That idiot again started to laugh at me and said "God will be with me? then why am I born poor and why are you rich? God is never on my side." and turned sad by the time he complete the sentence.

I couldn't answer him at that instant but started to think about it.

Next time when Anusha rang me I posed the same to her.

She said "Your present life is because of your deeds in your previous."

I got the answer and rushed back to him and said "May be you committed some sin in your previous life and so you are born poor this year."

After thinking for a moment he said "What if this is my first life? Even though if not. In my first i should have acted the way god decided my face. Then why did he made my fate to commit sin?"

I was absolutely stunned listening to him "From where the hell did he get these thoughts?" I thought.

In a sad tone he said "God is never with me.How hard may I try my fate remains the same.He already decided it this way."
I'm moved hearing this.Even I started thinking "Why is god not with him?"

"So you are wrong trying to suggest me. Just give me money if you can or just leave it. But don't give any bloody free advice that of no use. Don't waste your time." He said.

I know that I wasn't wrong.Ofcourse that shouldn't be wrong.I was just trying to suggest him something good.But still I didn't have the answer for his questions.

"If i cannot answer them,I can't convince him to stop begging.And all of my try would be a waste. And if this is the reason that made him see no hope in better future, then he might start trying for a better one if I can answer his questions.So somehow I need to find the answer now" I thought

Though I couldn't find the exact answer I suddenly got an idea to convince him.

"You are a genius" I said.

He came closer and said "what?"

"I have never seen someone thinking like you. You are a genius" I said.

He started feeling proud.

"But How would I come to know that you are a genius if I just give you money and leave?

How is it wasting time,if I find a genius while try to suggest?

So this means that you are wrong saying that I am wasting my time.

And may be you will meet some one like me who find you genius and can help you.

And may be this is your first life and the rest of your life may be very good.
So may be god will be with you in the rest of the life if you try hard to earn a car.
may be this is the time you should start trying hard to better your life." I said.

I saw him puzzled then.

Awhile later he said "I'll try hard for now to earn my car.If still god doesn't help me, then you are wrong. But I hope and wish you are not wrong."

Looking into sky "God I don't know why you made him a beggar, but now he will really try hard to change his fate. Be with him and make me win." I thought.

Friday, January 1, 2010

Blind-Vision

Part 1

After 1989 7th march..5th jan'09 is when i got my vision back.I spent rest of my life in darkness.With the vision of my eyeball,my vision of world has changed.Today I have a situation where I need to take the decision of my life.So I open my life to you in this blog.


I was 3years old by the time I turned into a complete blind.For the complete care of mine, my parents didn't have another baby.I have no siblings.Days and Nights were same for me.I crashed into every object.Gradually I learned to sense things through my hands.My parents described every object,they said "sun is round like a ball,big than earth,hot than fire,and bright than me".They described things in every possible way and i imagined them.


My schooling started at my 5.Not an ordinary school,a school specially for my kind,a blind school.We have a special god, he is called BRAILLE.He invented a script,BRAILLE SCRIPT,without which studying would have been a challenge of our lives.


Part 2

Louis Braille:

Tuesday, December 29, 2009

20plus minutes



lub dub......lub dub.....lub dub....lub dub...lub dub..lub dub.lubdublubdublubdublubdub................................................................It's getting heavier and heavier.


Oops! Let me introduce myself..this is chinna.I was a 10year old boy when this happened to me.First ever thrilling experience of my life.I just thought of sharing it with you guys.Let me tell you, you miss something if such things do not happen in lyf.Without wasting anymore time, here i'm switching to what happened.


That day...


Determined very hard..finally i managed to wake up at 5 in the morning.I grabbed my brush..started brushing tardily.


"Blast! a sudden blast in my heart"
Hardly 7 meters away I see 6eyes staring at me.."Thieves" I realized.


"I shall hit them down" I thought for a moment.They stepped forward.God! they are muscular...really muscular.Now i cannot even think of touching them.


"Don't wake mom.She will be scared.i'll handle this" I thought.

My mind started scanning if it can find any solution..5minutes passed..Result: No Solution found.We four remained unmoved,staring at each other.

No option I should shout I decided..
"Shout" i thought..But I couldn't shout..my tongue isn't obeying my mind..may be coz for some reason it is angry with him or still asleep rather it is afraid too as me..

"lub dub......lub dub.....lub dub....lub dub...lub dub..lub dub.lubdublubdublubdublubdub........Heartbeat..it is getting heavier and heavier, louder and louder. May be loud enough to be audible to other three in the room too.." i felt.


Time passed..Slowly I moved my hand and grabbed a wicket.Holding tight I raised it as if i'm gonna hit them.With the wicket i signaled them to run away.They neither moved nor I found them afraid of my act..I wondered "why are they standing still..why don't they beat me if they are not afraid..why don't they run away if they are afraid..why standing still!?"


"What now?" i questioned my mind.."Pray to all gods you know, they will help" it replied.I did it. I prayed to all gods i know, nothing helped..I could hardly notice 2 things happening..My heart beating at rapid pace and Time passing..already 20plus minutes passed..

"Shout..Shoutloudly..Scream" i started saying myself..Finally I was about to scream "Thie..."
My mom woke up, entered the room and saw us.Moving quickly "They are running..catch them" she shouted.In a moment they really ran away..
I'm still in shock..shock that my mom was not scared.She saved me, I would have died with fear.

"Its okay..Its over they are no more here"she said to me.
Yes, it's over..Finally it's allover..

Monday, December 28, 2009

conversation with her


" I am angry" I started my conversation with her.
Ignoringly she said "why?"
"Not a msg for a month, this is no joke, listen to me idiot I'm serious.."irritated me said to her.
"I'm serious too" she said.
I wondered why?
Turning her head towards me she questioned " Is this the attitude towards the loved? Is this what all a love is meant to you?"

"not my fau.." interrupting me she said "may be yours.."

"I have no patience yet i maintained my patience in this issue" I said sorrowfully with a hint of irritation again.

she replied"think if u really understand a girl..think how much u have hurt ur love..think how much pain u caused.."
Couldn't control myself I screamed " i know the pain i'm going through".
Dropping her franky down,feeling uneasy she looked around, everyone noticed us..i guess she decided not to talk to me anymore..
I apologized for minutes.

Controlling her anger Anusha said " not a word you speak ,it is tough to say to someone so arrogant and matured like you.. so just listen.You are good and sweet..but idiot, this is not enough to be forever with your most loved..you always said you got the best partner, the best you have ever met, making me proud & jealous of your love for bhanu..trust me you still make the best pair..go to her.. no matter what, don't leave her.."
she stopped for reply..


But not a word come for me..I tried to speak..tried to justify myself..But how hard i tried , it didn't matter..i couldn't justify..she brainwashed me..she turned my anger to guilty..may be this is why she is my best friend..


A tear rolled down while i picked my phone to ring my love..

A long rather unended conversation apologizing each other went on..

All thanks to you friend..